You Need A NEW FURNACE
... and other bullshit lies
That’s the working title of a book I have not assembled yet on the shyster FRAUD WORLD of HVAC repair.
Our Little Red Hen Jeannettically Modified had her fern ass go out on her so I tried to work her through a few checks to see if we could isolate what was wrong and maybe have her resolve it herself. We had a scare for a minute that the utility company had turned off her gas but she is full of gas so that isn’t it.
Here’s an simple tutorial on the sequence of events for most 80% to 90% furnace operations. There are other repair and instruction videos that I highly endorse but they are not necessary for this brief expose of the SYSTEMIC CORPORATE/GOVERNMENT FRAUD that is rampant.
Notice: I am not a licensed licentious HVAC anything. Just a Farm Boy who has seen, felt, smelt (not the fish), tasted, and heard enough shit to call it is it is: Hard turds, Diary Queen soft serve, Liquid Gold, etc., etc., etc. .
Some might say that I’m a Shitexpert.
Lettuce deconstruct what happened when she called in a ‘professional’.
So the furnace showed up for $119 plus criminal taxation. So $124 & some change.... which I didnt get back.....cuz I was shoving him out da door.
So he looked at my furnace & discovered it was installed in 2007....he said they are built to last 15-20 years.
Then he went on to show me all of the shit that was wrong with it & said I'd be lucky IF I made it thru another winter. The inducer thing is wobbly , there rust on the inside from my central air dripping into the unit or some bullshit & there a burnt thing on the computer
looking motherboardish thing.
He tested the thermostat & said... That's broke too .... for $245 for the cheap ass model & another $150 to hook it up PLus the theft of taxation...You MAY have heat ... but then some of that other shit may break..... I Put him OUT. 400 bucks for a fucking thermostat?? WTF!
I didn't throw out my back yesterday when we were having fun "fixing" my furnace... But I opened some old ass mail today & I'm back in my favorite "L" position.
Running away = Gimping away... & it's gonna get COLD out there ...I have a nice space heater in here. AND a super hot red lizard lamp for chloe.
Here's the best part. He said that My air condo needs replacing too without even seeing it... BUt for NINE FUCKING THOUSAND DOLLARS, Plus 19% financing for TEN YEARS ... I can have a brand new coronary by next week!
Did I mention that I threw his ass out?
Pack a Lunch, kids, because I already said that I was compiling information for a book.
THIS IS AN INDUSTRY SHAKEDOWN.
shakedown /shāk′doun″/
noun
Extortion of money, as by blackmail.
A thorough search of a place or person.
A test or period of appraisal followed by adjustments to improve efficiency or functioning
yeah… #3 is just bullshit.
Two of our other Little Red Hens were visited by the Shyster crew in another illustrious state (of confusion) where he said quite honestly but not in a way that is understandable to anyone who isn’t immersed in HVAC, government shakedown, and outright collective planned obsolescence and fraud:
“You have an older furnace. I can’t repair it because starting in 2025 they will no longer sell replacement parts for it because state law says that all units must be upgraded to 90% efficiency. I can install *new* EIGHTY-PERCENT effeciency models before the deadline after which the price for those units will double.”
This is typical used car sales with the deadline and the emergency decision-making that will always lead to a disasterous outcome.
Did y’all catch that the 80% units were being outlawed?
So you can’t get parts. (bullshit lie)
So you have to BUY A WHOLE NEW FURNACE.
But you will be sold the SAME OLD LOW EFFICIENCY MODEL that is destined to be outlawed and no longer have parts available.
I was confronted with a similar shakedown a couple years ago where they wanted too swap out my 90% for some POS 80% for $3000.
“You need a New Furnace.”
Is born out of government collusion, corporate rape, and the fact that repair men are neither: repairers or men. They are NPC machines themselves that repeat a line that they were told because they INTEND to sell you a $3000+ package rather than replacing a $300 part. The reason is twofold: greed and the motherfuckers don’t know how to troubleshoot. Modern machines now have onboard diagnostics that are about as reliable as that wristwatch that the circus elephant just sat on (I said: SAT) but young kids never saw a dial telephone let alone a machine older then about 10 years because the fuckers literally tell you that the service life of a fern ass is only about that long.
FUCK ME WITH A STICK!
A $3000 machine has to be replaced every ten years?
No… not really… I read the comments under the BRAND NAME WEBSITE selling such units where a fellow wrote in to say that his fern ass failed in -40 F temps. The fern ass man came out, replaced it with a new unit and WITHIN TWO WEEKS THE BRAND NEW UNIT HAD FAILED BUT THEY COULDN’T FIX IT BECAUSE THE PARTS WERE UNAVAILABLE.
Shakedown.
Have I said yet that Fraud has NO STATUTE OF LIMITATIONS?
Inducer motor = costly but easy to change IF IT IS BAD. What TESTS DID HE DO?
Dripping cooling coils means that it was installed wrong from the beginning. I pick on the new generations of ‘kids’ but the old generation of shysters were no different.
Circuit board = also costly but easy to change IF IT IS BAD. What TESTS DID HE DO?
If the motor was seized a gentle tap on the housing might get it to spin at which time you know that it is bad so you HAVE to replace it. This is not best-practices but if you don’t have an ammeter and know what to do to measure voltage present then current draw then you are left with Farm Boy Fixes. JM wanted me to post this picture that I sent her on where to apply the rubber-handled diagnostic tool and what to avoid to make sure she didn’t create a NEW problem.
The thermostat CANNOT COST OVER THE AMOUNT THAT ANY HOME-OWNER CAN BUY IN THE STORE and write down the wire colors, their locations, unscrew them, re-screw them (yer gittin screwed anyway) and seeing of it REALLY WAS BAD!
WHAT TESTS DID HE DO?
I had to TRACE MY WIRES FOR DOZENS OF FEET TO FIND THAT THE THERMOSTAT SIGNALLING WIRES WERE CHEWED BY MICE AS THEY LAY ACROSS THE TOP OF METAL DUCTWORK. I ran new wires inside of CONDUIT.
Can you imagine an ass like that putting in a new thermostat, it not fixing the problem and then telling you that you needed a new furnace?
Yes there were fancy SMART theromostats (that will surveil you 24-7) for close to $180 but our girl Jeannette has a dumb furnace so how did the Shyster pull $234 out of he ass?
Sew, our girl Jeannette went on to say:
The company sent me this after he left INCASE I wanted to "think about it" while I freeze my ass off in the upcoming freeze this week. $245 fucking dollars PLUS another hundo something for install....They didnt even include the labor charges on this description of possible work. PLUS I already gave the nice con artist 125 buckaroos on the way out the door.
twats! so 125+ 245+ another 125 labor?? Is that $555 dead presidents for a fucking thermastat?
So HERE is what I REALLY paid. to find out WTF was wrong .....
I love my life :)
I’m glad that JM let me share our offline extravaganza with you to show the active fraud that is going on as an INSTITUTION. I regret that I suggested that she throw away that much money on a shyster, but if she ever wanted to risk replacing any of these items herself it is fully within the scope of someone of her skills to do so.
Working on any equipment implies the risk of something going wrong. Knowledge and skill are required in such situations.
NEWFUCKINGSENTENCE:
Butt! We have seen that the central air on top of the furnace was already LEAKING INTO THE FURNACE so the knowledge and skill required for catastrophic failure being avoided was not required by government license or regulation.
Knowledge and skill of mathematics shows that IF the thermostat was bad then at ONE-TENTH THE COST the homeowner can replace it themselves.
This is a common practice amongst the folks that have little knowledge and less specialized tools. If you swap it out and it fixes it - then that part was bad. If it does not fix it then either it was bad and something else was wrong or you are just out $30 instead of $555.
This Stack is presented for ENTERTAINMENT PURPOSES ONLY (hey! Tragedies on TV and in the Movies are called ‘entertainment’) reader assumes all risk. (Including that of being totally disgusted and belligerent against a fraudulent DANGEROUS FACIST COLLUSION.)
All the best to JM. May Globe Hell Warming come through on its promise so that your winter is a wonderland of unbearable heat with no snow and extinct Sea Monkeys everywhere.
FREE THE BRINE SHRIMP!!!!
Off Topic - This regime change in Syria is interesting. Syria has its own central bank and bans any corporate owned businesses from entering the country - they make their own soda drinks and ban Coke and Pepsi. They make their own clothes and no corporate owned farms. But under Assad they grew dependent on Russian and Iranian money to pay their military which was corrupted by the money. Machiavelli once wrote that you can't win a war with a mercenary army. So, why did Syria fall overnight? Probably because foreign subsidies for their army ran out and the army having no allegiance to the people, and corrupted by an alternative offer from Yahoods and USA printed dollars, shifted allegiances and renamed themselves "Al Queda".
Moral of Story: there is no more virtue in a mercenary army than there is in an AC repairman.
I LOVE how you depants the extortionists! It's ALWAYS worse than we THINK it is when it comes to gov regulation. I suspect that THIS is another reason WHY they always want to you to register "stuff" for warranties & such too!
SO, I've got a "NEW" old stock round mercury dial thermostat in a box somewhere around here Locating it is proving difficult.
It'll look dumb on the wall anyways (IF I ever locate it) cuz of the "possibly broken" thermostat is 5"wide x 4"tall rectangle & I painted AROUND it. Eggshell over blue gray. Smart move heh? But HEAT over vanity!!
I see there's 4 wires. coded with letters. Y/O R/Jump? G & something unreadable. Goodie. I have no RED wire....maybe the brown one will work?
AND now, my craftsman digital multimeter is not metering. Oh the joys of LIFE!
Still contemplating running away. ... well, in my case...I'm several decades over 18 ... so I'd technically just be LEAVING. Lololol You truly are a GEM Patrick. ... Not sure I would have come out of this event so chipper if it weren't for YOU!✨💖✨ Thank You! :)