Fomenting Whirled Piece

...with Anne R. Obick

I’ve said often in print and in audio that properly anaerobically fermented asparagus with carrots is so delicious that it alone should be able to bring about world peace.

There was a jar lurking in the back of my refrigerator for at least two years that visibly was a stack of asparagus like cordwood with another cordwood stack of sliced carrots above it. The top had just a tiny bit of a non-pathogenic yeast called Kahm at the interface of the top of the brine and the space above where the gasses that includes just a tiny bit of evolved oxygen would be. The yeast had disintegrated over time probably because the gasses were now oxygen free.

You never know what your going to get in these troubled times so I put my Olfactory Analyzer on the job to find that it smelled really good. It smelled - different.

I pulled a raft of carrots out and was surprised at the cluster of green leaves that came up with it. It was so long ago and as the phrase goes: I haven’t slept since then, so I didn’t remember how I made these. So I tried a carrot and it was a very unusual but tasty flavor. In the past I have used horseradish leaves for awesome ferments, but as I dumped my prize into the bowl I saw that the green clump was OREGANO STEMS.

No wonder it was tasty and unusual.

It was - in fact - awesome. I often experiment with the hopes that it won’t be a disaster that has to be buried next to the garden, so once in a while you get a winner.

After this many years it confirms that you can indeed store properly fermented asparagus that will be not quite as crunchy as 1-year old stalks but they were still firm and totally edible.

To be clear: this requires properly sealed borosilicate glass vessels like Fido Jars from Bormioli, and an AIR-LOCKED lid. This is NOT the typical See Eye Aye-fostered rotting food on countertops in mason jars in the light nonsense.

Anaerobic fermentation happens in air-locked jars in the dark and the process takes at least 21 days not 3 days before you eat your vinegar swill because this process is TRUE lactic acid bacteria action.

http://www.lulu.com/shop/kim-chi/anaerobic-food-fermentation-for-the-home/paperback/product-22815402.html

The Lacto-ferment movement (sounds like a bowel movement) was perverted to mean putting Whey in the jar as part of the LACTO part. With the added deception that Lactobacillus has anything to do with it. It does but Lactobacillus plantarum (that DARPA has just messed with the genome) not Lactobacillus acidophilis that people associate with milk and yoghurt.

NO WHEY!

Whey is the MOST BACTERIOPHAGE POLLUTED SUBSTANCE ON THE PLANET. So, whereas Stryer’s Biochemistry said in 1979 that Milk is not food but a liquid made drinkable by pasteurization - in my book (Book of Jordan) Whey is just a weapon for stupid people.

Since no one I’ve met is as smart as me, then I will rescind the stupid people and expand it to Ignorant People since ignorance can be correct. Stupid is forever. Witches not to say that Stupid people can’t and won’t eat whey, its just that now that you’ve read this post you can’t be Ignorant anymore.

Now, the reason - and it is almost a Spear It Too Well feeling that I have - regarding the ability of a marvelous, delicious food to bring peace to humanity is based on my view that Evil is a contagious disease. Anaeorbic fermenting has been done throughout time by mankind (different than brewing = aerobic process involve actual yeast) and therefore it is a BIOLOGICAL PROCESS. If we could heal people on a biological level, if we could destroy Evil by biological means, then the myths/legends of the Garden of Eden might no longer be myths (unless you have a lisp and then I can’t help you).

I could imaging that in earlier times that Asparagus might have even grown as tall and thick as sapling trees. The way I grow asparagus is to make a trench 12” deep to place the crowns in, then backfill as they sprout, then build the soil back up to level over time so that the plot can be tilled in the spring time to keep the weeds down. Given that they start one-foot in the ground to begin with, when I tell you that I harvest fully edible 18” stalks some of which can be 2” wide for purple and green hybrids and that they are broken off well above the ground, then my notion that in better days gone buy we might have been able to feed our families on a single As Pair Eye Gus was not an exaggeration.

I continue to act and communicate as if the world isn’t falling apart at the seams (it is - I’m not blind or stupid … OK - I’m not blind!) because if we abandon Hope but have a GOAL to work towards then we can at least dye trying.